SOTM: The Pussycat Dolls - Hush Hush

I don't really know what to do about my situation. =(
Everythings kinda eurgh at the moment. Things liek to repeat themselves.
And I'm in an awkward position. Either be the victim or be in control of the victim. =(
Of course save myself the heartbreak and be in control.
But it means someone else is going to have the heartbreak... maybe...
I don't know what to do...

Maybe my plan to remove myself from both situations and start fresh...
hmm... but could i really be able to do that...
It'd ruin things in both situations... Sigh...

Why can't you see it? Why can't you see the good that comes out of me? =(
It makes me sad that you can't see it... Or maybe you do see it...
But you jus stopped cause you dont want to settle...
You're jus a slut probably and you want to be free and don't want to be held back..
Maybe...

I got asked recently.. "Relationship or Fun?"...
It took me by surprise and I didn't know how to answer it.
I wasn't sure... But as D. said, its a stupid question. There is no right answer.
Cause I want both? I don't actually know. I want to settle but at the same time...
I'm still young so I should have fun... so I don't know...

And you. You're like the best thing ever! The best type to settle with.
But because of the person you are I can't do the wrong thing and make you break.
Cause I was you. And it hurts to be broken and I don't want you to go through it. =(

...and I'll be loving you all the time it's true cause I wanna make it right with you......

SOTM: Beyoncé - Disappear

If i beg and if i cry
Would it change the sky tonight
Will it give me sunlight
Should i wait for you to call
Is there any hope at all
Are you drifting by

When i think about it
I know that i was never held or even cared
The more i think about it
The less that i was able to share with you
I try to reach for you, i can almost feel you
You're nearly here
And then you disappear
(disappear, disappear, disappear)
You disappear
(disappear, disappear, disappear)

And then i lie all by myself
I see your face, i hear your voice
My heart stays faithful
And time has come and time has passed
If it's good it's got to last
It feels so right

When i think about it
I know that i was never held or even cared
The more i think about it
The less that i was able to share with you
I try to reach for you, i can almost feel you
You're nearly here
And then you disappear
(disappear, disappear, disappear)
You disappear
(disappear, disappear, disappear)
You, you disappear

I missed all the signs
One at a time you were ready
What did i know starting our lives
No my love, i'm ready to shine

When i think about it
I know that i was never held or even cared
The more i think about it
The less that i was able to share with you
I try to reach for you, i can almost feel you
You're nearly here
And then you disappear
You disappear, you disappear
You disappear, disappear

I've been thinking lately. Thinking. Something I tend to overdo and it seriously does my head in. It makes me go absolutely crazy. Especially recently, well since like the other day actually.

You're a fucking bitch! What is your problem? You're so fucken consumed by your ego that you're missing the bigger picture. Noone really gives a shit and noone really believes all that shit anyways! You think you've got it all but you've got shit!

You're exactly the kind of person I hate the most! Its because of people like you that I get fucked named and people think I'm the bad guy. FUCK YOU! You're ok most of the time but you're so fucking sad! Accept where you are and embrace it! I realised now that you're kind of a loser. That's why it always ends badly for you. I don't plan on getting close to you or any closer. I doubt I'll see you alot you can have your exclusive gatherings. I don't really care nor do I want to be seen around that shit!

So I heard some stuff recently! I don't really give a shit anymore. I'm kind of over it. It doesn't really phase me no more. Don't really give a shit! I know you'll give me the 3rd degree about it but so fucking what. You're not better than me or anything. I don't need to be preached to, you can take your shit and preach it to someone who really cares. You wouldn't have the balls anyways but if you did somehow get the balls to do it. I'll fucking take whatever you say and slap it right back in your face! I don't give a shit what we have or whatever! I was told about something you said. You're so immature! You may have the marks to qualify to be book smart but in real life you're fucking ignorant!

Lastly... I think I sometimes hate you the most! I'm glad you've changed and become the person you are now! BUT sometimes I wonder... What if you were different?

SOTM: The Ian Carey Project - Get Shaky (Vandalism Remix)

Last night was Vacey's HOT Jungle Party up at World Bar in Kingcross. It was so good seeing all the Fort St kids again! =)
Really good seeing everyone again. Met up with some of the asians at Maloney's before cabbing it to the cross. It was a random night. Lots of randoms and then random occurances such as part of the ceiling collapsing! LOL. Funny.

It's a Friday night and here I am at home. =( But I've got no money anyways. Poor! Gotta call my boss tomorrow so he can get my paperwork done so I can get paid by the coming week!! MONEY!! =D

Last Friday had a great time with some of the Soompi kids. 18+ meetup this time. Started drinking at 6pm followed by dinner and the further drinking! =) Karaoke and then MORE drinking. Then some of us decided to go to the bottle-o and get some more alkie and head to a park.

Heaps of fun. Reliving our childhood at the playground before going back for yet MORE alkie then sitting at the wharf. It was a good night. Spent about the same as I would on a night out at the clubs. But I got more alcohol this way. HAHAH =)

Nothing eventful really. Waiting for something to happen.
Here's some snapshots from the last two outings.